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By the time …

~ by the time ~ ©Thesunsetgirl.Com

~ by the time ~ ©Thesunsetgirl.Com

My cousin died last Tuesday.

It is as simple as that to many people but us because of so many reasons.

First of all, he was too young to go – 32 years old. Even his parents decided to delay the time of his funeral (this Saturday) just so we can spend more time ‘being with him’.

Needless to say, this is one of the most challenging weeks I have ever had.

Second of all, he left his wife with four children and the youngest is still a baby. For the most time, I didn’t know what to say at first to support his wife.

Well, I didn't even know what to think. There is this huge 'WHY' circling inside my head!

I know he made a lot of mistakes in his past and he had to be responsible to each and every one of them. However, death was surely never one of the options! Everybody was caught by surprise when we heard the news on early Tuesday morning.

 

My first thought; I wish life had given him another chance.

 

The toughest part of his passing is what we learned later on. It turned out that he had known that he was going to go after visiting a doctor who told him about his illness. It was pretty bad as the results of years of addiction. He stopped being a drug addict but never gave up drinking. Instead of letting us know, he kept it for himself.

 

He then wrote a letter.

 

It was a letter for his wife, children, parents, in-laws, brothers, sisters, cousins, uncles and aunts. He apologized for all the mistakes he did in the past and for not being there to bring up his kids. His older brother found the letter one day after he passed away and read it in front of the entire families. My soul was shaken! In the end of the day, I wish HE had given himself another chance.

 

I am grateful, still, for having him as a cousin of mine.

 

I whispered farewell before going to bed last night.

 

I will say it out loud at the funeral tomorrow.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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  • Jemmy

    Goodbye Glen! :-(

    • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

      I’ll let you know the complete story asap, okay? Thanks, cousin!

      • Jemmy

        Yes, please…. I not there…. I still have the ‘why’ question….

        • Dee

          Forgive yourself and try hard to move on. You all ok there?

          • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

            I think he knows that already. I hope his wife will see how hard he fight for their family and maybe she will follow him and be a Christian? I’m proud of him.

  • Vallya

    Life is not easy but never give up. We’ll miss him….

    • Olive

      I can’t agree more!

      • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

        Thank you! Life must go on and everything will be okay… Valya: See you soon!

  • Olive

    I’m so sorry, Lus…. Hugs!!!

    • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

      Thanks for everything!!!

  • Lm

    Be strong! Everything happen for a reason. . . .

    • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

      I know… All done? ;-) xoxo

  • Andre

    Nobody was prepare for the letter… :-(

    • Vallya

      So true!!!

      • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

        There are into the story but it’s not for public consumption. Let’s just try our best to move on. You guys be good, alright?!

        • Vallya

          Ok, sis… in life we all make mistakes… forgiveness is necessary… how? by be grateful… life is good… hugs!!!!

          • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

            Yes, forgive everybody including yourself. I’m sorry it was cancelled. Gosh, I was already thinking what to wear. But you have a new one now. All I can say, I support your decision no matter what.

            • Vallya

              I’m sorry too but well… glad you can accept that one is over… Mega told me about your message… my mom told me about your call… I more afraid of you than everybody else…. LOL…

              • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

                Silly girl! It was a bit of a shock, that’s all. More later, okay? Thanks, cousin! xoxo

  • Your Auntie

    A lot of people ask the ‘why’ question…. let just accept the fact and try the best to move on…

    • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

      There’s nothing we can do even if we get the answers to those ‘why’ questions. Thanks for being here, auntie. Hugs!!!

      • Your Auntie

        I have to say that we fight for our children. It’s time your generation fight for future. This is the sign … no more wasting time … One more thing, I never see a photographer who cry every time she take pictures … you have a good heart Lus … HUGS!!!!!!!

        • Vallya

          I was not there… I got there late at night so everybody is gone… :-( Sorry, sis… When can I see the pictures? Let me know please? HUGS!!!!!!

          • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

            Auntie, I’m beginning to think that comments from families should be moderated from now on. Really! That crying part should have been OFF the record! O_o

            Valya, I’m calling you asap. Are you off today or? Hard working at a hotel, huh? Hope you guys didn’t get lost last night. Anyway, more later…

  • Brian

    Now I understand the following blog. My condolences…

    • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

      Thank you, Brian!

  • http://twitter.com/RuzihaOsman Ruziha Osman

    I feel for you and family, Lusy. It must have been hard… My condolences again… Big hugs!

    • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

      Thanks so much, Ruzie! I appreciate the concern. Hugs!!!

  • Lorna

    Many hugs Lucy.

    • http://www.thesunsetgirl.com/ Lusy Aaltje

      Thank you so much, sis!!! xxx